Mirror, mirror

While I was out for lunch today, 2 young ladies, engaged in animated conversation and joyous laughter caught my eye. What rapport and camaraderie they have!

Looking at them, I realize they were mirroring each other. When one waved her hand, the other followed suit. One brushed her hair, the other did the same. Their gestures were synchronizing so well, it’s not difficult to see why they’re such good friends.

According to relationship experts, nothing will bond you more effectively than mirroring someone's behaviour. It makes the person feel like they are looking at a subconscious mirror of themselves. People tend to trust other people who are like them and mistrust people who seem different. If someone is doing what we're doing, we feel they're on the same level as us and in the same mood as we are.

Wanna make someone feel you're "in sync" with them? Try mirroring to create that magic connection but do so with care, and be sincere about it.

Trying too hard to mirror someone may sometimes backfire. If you're using it as a "technique" to build rapport, chances are the person you're talking with will intuitively know that you are using a "technique" on them. They will also conclude you are not authentic, can't be trusted and are probably trying to manipulate them.

Good luck!