Entry from backside only

If you stood outside the toilet this morning, you could hear me chuckling inside. I was reading an old magazine while doing the deed and came across an article...

In Singapore, we speak Singlish (English mixed with our local slangs) . In India, they speak Indlish and they're proud of it.

When in India, don't be alarmed if you find the sign "Enter from Backside Only". It only means that you should use the rear entrance of a building. While the farmers in Rajasthan are encouraged to "grow herbs in their backsides" (backyards), "Don't do nuisance in public" is the government admonition against urinating in public.

A popular opening line in official letters is "Dear sir, with reference to your above see my below..."

A recruit in a call centre once wrote an email that began with "I am well here and hope you are also in the same well."

It is also common to find receptionists asking callers, "What is your good name?" before informing them the boss has gone "out of station" with his "cousin brother" (male cousin).

Puzzling enough? How about 'preponing' (bringing forward) meetings or 'air-dashing' to a destination and 'issueless' couples (those without children)?

If you're trying to impress your girlfriend after 'she freaked out last night' (she had a good time), try this "Your lyrical missive has enveloped me in the sweet fragrance of our love."

Going to India anytime soon? Maybe you should get yourself a 'teachress' (female teacher) first!