Wednesday 3 February 2010

Old lady part 2

I left the old lady's house feeling worse than before. The scars and marks on her face and arms are still raw. What kind of a daughter-in-law can be so vicious to attack a gentle, soft-spoken old lady? Even the 7-year old grandson is hitting her with a broomstick, the same one she had lavished so much love on when bringing him up. The situation is getting out of control, no wonder she's so desperate to get out.

She has gone to the police and social services but nobody is able to help her. There are even more severe cases than hers, she just has to wait in line and watch her back. Their family situation is already quite a complicated one, but having to live with a raging mad woman makes it even worse. I feel like I've been sheltered from the real world all this time, this is quite an eye-opener. I'm sure there are many people out there who are in need of help. It makes me feel bad that while we're discussing about exotic holidays and fine dining, some other people are living their life in fear.

Anyone who has a heart will feel compelled to help. I'm going to see what I can do to bring them out of this misery. Of course I recognise that I have my limitations but I'll try.

I must have learned a lesson or two from all this. Firstly, I must build my own nest egg so that I can stay independent in my old age. Secondly, I must have my own home. Once you've assigned it to someone else, even your own children, you become a guest in your own home.

As parents, our love for our kids is unconditional but we can't expect the same in return. Even then, between the wife and mother, who will they choose?

14 comments:

Petunia Lee said...

Oh dear! A beaten old lady! Oh dear! Marks of physical abuse... That's TERRIBLE!!!

Fresh Fry aka 福星 said...

i wonder if she can check herself into an old folks home under government subsidy......

Blur Ting said...

Evil right? The trouble is they're a family unit - aged parents and a middle-aged daughter. So whilst some places like nunnery are willing to take the women in to work as live-in caretaker, they will not accept the dad who is not very healthy.

It's quite complicated too cos the parents have their names joint with another son in a HDB flat. That son refused to transfer their name out. So they find it hard to get a 1-room government rental flat. Aiya, family problems aplenty.

Nick Phillips (15/03/1967 - 04/11/2022) said...

Good God! How can anyone beat an old lady, in fact how can anyone even beat another human being?

k@Ye_ said...

Its so terrible!! Poor lady, she must be bleeding inside her heart!

I hope the relevant authorities will step in to help after making the police report & stuff....

Blur Ting said...

Nick - You're right. As long as someone lays a finger, he is in the wrong. In this case, a young lady hitting an old feeble one is really wrong!

Blur Ting said...

Kaye - Another complication here. Her son works in public service (quite high flyer) and he insisted that they do not charge the wife or else his job will be at stake. Then everyone, including his mum, will suffer cos got no income.

See, I told you it's complicated.

Petunia Lee said...

High flyer so what!! Physical assault is a crime!!

Open Kitchen Concept said...

Oh dear! This is terrible! I wish there is something I can do to help too...

Blur Ting said...

OKC - I'm trying to find a place (church or something similar) who needs a live-in caretaker. The daughter will do clean/cook in exchange for a place for her and parents to stay.

She's very good at taking care of young and old folks (she's a patient and kind girl. They're Catholics), so maybe there are old people who are living alone in a house with spare room but need someone to be around to clean/cook and do house work.

k@Ye_ said...

Ting, oh dear.. really complicated...

Pray tt they will have a shelter soon.

auntielucia said...

Hi Blur, this is terrible. Can't they go to their Family Service centre which almost every HDB cluster has one to seek some relief? As I can't see any shelter taking in one person to work who comes with two others..

Worse comes to worse, pse contact the Breadline Group; they have many contacts. I will eml you their contact addresses separately. If not anything, they should at least know what are the best strings/ropes to pull with MCYS et al..

Fresh Fry aka 福星 said...

alot of times, if a child is in the public service, he/she would want to hush everything up to save their career.

and because being in the public service, it's almost a route of no return 'cos they have almost no market value in the private sector.

and in the local public service, being "happily" married (= no divorce, scandal, separation) is a denomination to promotions. yes, one will be considered for promotion more than the single one if he/she is married.

the rationale can seem absurd, but it was widely thought tat a married individual wouldn't be that prone to jeopardise their career going wayward (corruption, abusing the system etc), therefore more considered for promotions

and then, the parent would want to protect the child's career and suffer in silence.

Amel said...

I'm shocked to hear that the lady has been treated like that. Ugh...abuse of any kind is awful and intolerable. :-((((

Very wise decision, Blur, about the future.

Chowmahalla Palace

During our week in Hyderabad, some of the places we visited include the Mecca Mosque, the Charminar (the icon of Hyderabad), Sufi Shrine, Bi...