I had an argument with YK last Sunday. It happened after I heard him chatting with my friend. Through my observation, he sounded like a discontented person. Everything, from his house to the school, is either useless or not good enough.
In the car, I questioned him about his negativity. He denied he was being negative, then he gave me the cold shoulder the rest of the night.
I'm easily affected by someone else's moods. His displeasure made me very uneasy. When he left for school the next morning, I sat down and wrote him a letter. I knew that I could put in all my thoughts in a letter, words that you can never get across during a fight. True enough, my letter was 6 pages long.
I spoke of many things, about how I'm always advocating positivity yet I seem to have an unhappy kid at home. What happened to that sweet, loving and compassionate boy I once knew.
I sat and admired my untidy but lively handwriting before placing the letter strategically on his computer keyboard, the first thing he would see when he returns home.
I felt ill at ease the entire day at work. Had I been too harsh? Teenagers like him are supposed to be angsty afterall.
When I got home, the letter was still there. He wasn't back yet. By then, I was no longer angry, maybe I should chat with him instead. I folded the letter and kept it in my handbag.
He was chatty during dinner and the letter was forgotten. Three days later, he spoke to me, "I've read the letter. I saw it earlier while I was looking for the camera in your bag."
"Oh, it was meant for you. Can you tell me why teenagers are so full of negativity these days?", I asked.
"Some of my friends in school are much more whiny than me!" Then he looked remorseful and asked, "How do you want me to change?"
For a start, I don't want to hear him saying the word "useless" again. He may use it appropriately on an object but not on a person.
I appreciate that bad habits can be hard to break. That day, I caught him telling his friend, "This Rusty does nothing but sleeps all day! He's so not useful."
Well, I can see that he's trying to change. It made me smile.
Anyway, his friend replied, "Rusty is useful, he makes people happy."