When asked why she won't have kids, the very beautiful and talented actress Maggie Cheung said "I decided when I was watching the news during 9/11. When I saw those planes crash into the buildings I said to myself that I didn't want to bring anyone into this suffering. That moment clarified it for me."
She has got a point. As parents, we're constantly worrying about our children. If they're sick, we worry about their condition; if they're well, we worry how they're coping in school. If they're grown up, we worry about how they're coping in life. If they have kids, we worry about them and our grandkids.
I've never seen my mom cry. She's a very stoid lady who doesn't even cry at funerals but she said she cried when she visited me at the hospital after I had given birth to YK. The sight of me lying in the hospital bed, bloated and ugly yet beaming with joy as I cradled my newborn baby brought tears to her eyes. She thought to herself, "My daughter is now a mother, but she looks like a whale. She's no longer a sweet beautiful girl."
She also shed tears when my brothers were undergoing their basic military training (which is mandatory in Singapore). When she saw how skinny and dark they had become, with their head shaven, it just broke her heart.
She used to tell me, "I can't bear seeing my kids fall sick, especially when you all were little. It's worse than me falling sick myself."
I agree, most mothers wish they could take over their child's illness, pain and suffering. Recently, my friend pawned away all her jewelry so that she could help her son who's struggling overseas. I couldn't understand it. Why? That'll leave her with nothing for her old age. That was all she had!
She just looked at me with steely eyes. "But he's my son."