Sunday, 28 September 2008

Cruel world

Though I'm not a big fan of F1, I can't help but feel so sorry for the Ferrari team. Though Felipe Massa started so well by leading the pack, he made a terrible mistake of driving off with the fuel rig still attached to his car during a pit stop, knocking one of the crew off the ground in the process. From 1st position, he ended up in 13th place.

His team mate, reigning world champion Kimi Raikkonen's car crashed into the wall towards the end of the race. He had only 4 more laps to go. The team could have finished 1st and 2nd, instead they finished with no points. Heartbreaking.

It was also very painful to see a very morose and subdued YK all weekend. Last Thurday, he was reprimanded by his teacher for all the wrong reasons. It was simply a case of being at the wrong place, at the wrong time.

It's not easy being a teacher in a school full of teenage boys but this particular teacher has managed to established a very good rapport with her students. While other teachers portray a very severe and no-nonsense stance with the boys, this lady has been successful in playing the role of a nurturing and caring teacher. Ever so friendly and chatty, she's obviously a favourite amongst the students who feel that they can talk to her about everything under the sun.

For some reason, her personality suddenly switched that afternoon. Maybe the stress of managing a class of boisterous teens had taken a toll on her, or perhaps the lack of discipline in her class as a result of being too chummy with the boys is showing, she suddenly snapped. At that time, the class was rowdy while she was trying to teach. Nothing unusual about that. It's a daily occurence. YK turned to his friend to hush him up so he could hear the teacher speak.

She suddenly pointed to YK and started accusing him of talking in class. She didn't give him any chance to defend himself. She just kept yelling at him, shooting him down when he tried to explain and finally sent him out of the class. Everyone was shocked. Why was this nice teacher behaving this way? No one dared to utter a word.

Feeling like a sitting duck, YK muttered under his breath as he walked out. She went ballastic and threatened to send him to the principal's office for caning.

A male teacher walking by came to her defense, threatening YK that he will be punished. She was crying and shouting at YK who stood there dumbfounded and defenseless. He had never felt so wronged in his life.

He came home late, feeling drained emotionally and physically after the face-off. He hadn't eaten all day and remained quiet and listless all night. He couldn't even bring himself to enjoy gaming or watching his favourite TV shows. His mind was filled with questions and worries. How can this happen just weeks before his important exams. What if he is really punished for something that he feels strongly wasn't his fault. How is it possible that the same teacher whom he was chatting with happily in the morning had turned against him.

It's sad to see things turn out this way. His friends think the situation will be forgotten by the time he goes to school today. YK loves going to school but he wasn't his boisterous self this morning. Yet the sensible boy knows it is important to go back no matter what the future holds. That's something I am tremendously proud of. I really dislike people who run away from problems.

As a mother, I hate to see my son being wrongly accused yet I know that I must stay out of this. Getting involved will make matters worse. It's an important lesson that such incidents are unavoidable as we go through life whether we like it or not. He must know that life can be cruel sometimes. Even winners like Ferrari can crash.

On a happier note, we saw Rusty over the weekend. He looks happy and fine, doesn't he?

Sniffing for lizards under the leg massager? He sure is busy.


mooiness said...

Wow. I've been in YK's position before. You feel totally wronged but powerless to do anything about it. You've probably have done this already: tell him it's not his fault.

As for the teacher, she could have just snapped under the pressure. Ask YK to observe how she behaves from hereon and act accordingly. Perhaps something has happened in her life and she has changed.

Blur Ting said...

For some reason, your comment is very comforting. I feel that the more outspoken ones like YK will tend to get into trouble with teachers sometimes. But that's just him, more opinionated than the quiet conformist.

I heard from YK that the teacher had a stressful day because someone stole stuff from the lab during her chemistry lesson, and they were running late for their next lab session, and she was having problems controlling the class...all these things probably made her think twice about being too friendly with the boys. So she lost it.

jyankee said...

Yep I saw the F1 race! Too bad for the Ferrari team eh? And school... I really hope it blows over and that the teacher does make some kind of an apology... Though a teacher, and though human... hopefully it's just a one-off thing. I know that teacher's are very powerful in Asian countries..but when they are wrong..they should be wrong...but like Mooiness says, just kind of play it by ear and see where the teacher goes from here on out.

Blur Ting said...

JY - You watched? I didn't but read about it in the papers.

YK swears he will never engage in friendly chats with the teacher again. He is too disappointed.

ckl said...

Yes, in situation like this, as parents we feel so unjust yet so helpless. Teachers here supposedly have less power than their counterpart in S'pore yet every now and then my daughter will come home in tears because wrongly accused of something she didn't do. Like you, I don't pick up the phone to call school as I believe this is something they need to learn to deal with even at a very young age. Life is not always fair but one has to rise above difficult time and always look at the bright side. I think as long as we as parents always there to support them; they march on, confident that they have not done anything wrong and knowing that someone dear to them believe in them. Really, in situation like this that's all we can do.

Blur Ting said...

CKL - I'm glad you share the same point of view. Kids will have to learn even the hard way to emerge stronger.

The Real Mother Hen said...

Ahhhh, that was an unfortunately situation that no one would want to be in. But two positive things came shining through it - that YK is sensible, his sensibility will guide him through this and you're a supportive and loving mom.

WaterLearner said...

I feel sorry for the Ferrari team as well. So close to victory!

I can understand how YK must be feeling now. I encountered something similar when I was in Pri 4. I was wronged for pushing a Pri 3 girl while we were all running for the bus. I did not know how she fell. But she went home telling her father that I was the one who pushed her.

Her father came to my class to reprimand me right in front of the form teacher. I denied. But I guess no one believed me.

It was until when I was in Pri 6 that that girl confessed to me that she had wronged me. She was reprimanded by her father for carelessness and had to find a convenient scapegoat. Two years later!! Imagine that ... I was wronged for two years.

Strangely, I wasn't that affected by the whole episode :-) ... Maybe my skin is thicker.

Blur Ting said...

MH- Indeed, I'm glad he's sensible enough. I'm sure you would do the same for your own child.

Blur Ting said...

Water - Unfortunately it happens alot in school. So poor thing, to be wrongly accused for 2 years!

It gets worse when they grow older because they feel humiliated etc. Plus, YK is a sensitive kid. I know he'll not hesitate to apologise if he's in the wrong but this time he really felt so wronged. I hope he got by in school ok today.

Nick Phillips said...

I feel for YK. I know we're all humans, but I personally think the teacher should not have snapped like that, especially to a student. But then, that's my opinion. I hope YK is feeling better.

As for the F1, I'm a die-hard McLaren fan so I'm not at all sad for Ferrari's misfortune ... hehehe ... But I'm sad for Kimi though.

Blur Ting said...

If she had picked on another student, the outcome would have been worse. Oh well...

Well Hamilton's performance was quite consistent with the qualifying round. They're still in the overall lead this year. Alonso's win was a big surprise!

The World According To Me said...

What an unfair situation. I hope YK is having a better day today.

ong said...

Tell YK to forcus on his study. Sometimes we make mistakes unknowingly. Learn to forgive the teacher and forget the incident. His will feel better and stronger.

Amel's Realm said...

Ohhhhhh...sorry to hear about YK being wronged, but you're right. Life is like that sometimes and YK has to learn to face this type of situations. You're a wise mother!!!

After reading your comment, no wonder the teacher snapped.

One of the teachers in my High School also snapped one day. She cursed during her wrath. I bet she was even surprised at her own reaction. She was heavily pregnant at that time. She apologized about her words and action the next time we met.

Another teacher who found out about this tried to talk sense to us, tried to make us understand, tried to make us be kinder to her. Well, it worked! I'm glad that other teacher talked to us about this problem during her lesson. :-))))

Blur Ting said...

World - Yah, he's in much better spirits now. He's the kind who can't stay moody for long :-)

Blur Ting said...

Ong - Thanks for your advice. Yah, he's the kind who forgives easily and has moved on. In fact yesterday he was working extra hard on his revision at home. Maybe this incident has made him wiser.

Blur Ting said...

Amel - teachers are also human beings. Imagine they have to deal with so many students everyday! I told YK that even parents who have tremendous love and tolerance for their kid's behavoir get angry ever so often, what about teachers? So I have warned him to always check his behavoir in school.