Wednesday 5 December 2007

Centre of the universe

I read an article in the papers on Monday and until today, it is still lingering in my mind. I quote "As we race off to explore the world's limitless opportunities, we can sometimes end up leaving our parents at the starting line, struggling to catch up and stay relevant."

When kids are young, parents are their centre of the universe. As a single parent, my kids look up to me for love, knowledge, recreation, food and money. One day, they're going to flee the nest and leave a gaping hole in my life.. me standing at the starting line, staring at their backs as they race away to a bright future.

Will I nag at them or guilt-trip them into role-playing the filial sons? I don't think so. I'll probably quietly watch over them and let them live their lives. But there will never be a time when I don't think or care about them, no matter how old they are.

Sometimes we find our parents troublesome and naggy when they ask about us. The least we can do is to show them that we care about their lives too. Afterall, they were once the centre of our little universe.

9 comments:

mooiness said...

My mother says the same thing about me and my brother too - that we will forever be little boys in her eyes. The other day she tried to show my brother how to put a band-aid on. Hahah!

Perhaps it's cultural, but I think caring about our parents is important. It reminds us where we came from and how we were, and I feel that keeps us grounded.

Blur Ting said...

Don't forget that the kids are the ones growing and changing... parents don't, especially the love they have for their kids. They just adjust and cope accordingly.

Blur Ting said...

I think as parents, we must try to narrow that generation gap or else we'll just get too alienated.

WaterLearner said...

Yups. Children are the centre of universe for parents. I do not have kids myself. But even at my age, my mum still treats me like I have never grown up. Still the Ah Girl in her eyes.

Amel said...

Hmmm...I think during teenage years the gap may happen...and it also depends on the kind of parents, I guess. I mean...both of us have always been close to Mom. We're not THAT close to Dad 'coz he sets himself up as a "dad". Mom's always SO MUCH easier to talk to and she's far more liberal than Dad. That's why it's easier for us to talk to her. And she always supports our dreams/goals he he he he...

I LOVE both of them tremendously, but esp. Mom. She's just EVERYTHING to me. :-)))) Even my friends are envious 'coz I have a Mom like her. I'm SO glad God has entrusted her to be my Mom. I can't be the person I am today without her.

I think when the kids are grown up, they'll understand more the role of parents. I mean, after I worked and paid for everything myself (well, except for food 'coz I still lived with my parents before I moved to Finland), I realized more their struggle to pay for our tuition fee and everything else.

I think personally speaking, I respect and love my parents more now than when I was a teenager, esp. now that I live far from them. :-)))))

Blur Ting said...

You have a point there, Amel. I try to be like a friend to my kids yet sometimes I read about how parents must be strict and disciplinary, and I go "uh-oh, maybe I am not doing it right.."

Well, I hope my kids will grow up into an appreciative adult like you.

Amel said...

Oh, my Mom was disciplinary when we were young. She didn't mind spanking us when we were naughty. We feared her greatly when we were kids. However, I think once she thought we were old enough to think for ourselves, she trusted us to choose our own way and she became more like a confidante then he he he...

So she's done a GREAT job mixing up teaching us about respect/confidante thingie he he he...I wish I could be like my Mom later on he he he...

Amel said...

Oh yeah, one last thing: I'm sure your kids will grow up fine. ;-))))

Unknown said...

what a great post and a great reminder...i'll go call my mom now :)

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