Did you know that women keep score in relationships on a subconscious level? When he gives to her, she gives him a point, and when she gives to him, she gives herself a point.
If you're a man who want to score points of love, should you splurge on an expensive gift? The answer is 'No'. This is not the way we women keep score.
When he does something big, he gets only 1 point, but when he does a lot of little things, he gets alot of points. Giving little acts of love, attention and offering to help will score you many points.
A married man gets 1 point for going to work, 1 point for returning and 1 point for being faithful. He does something great, like taking her out on a special date (which in testosterone terms scored 100 points) but to her, it may have been 3 or 4 points.
According to the author John Gray of "Why Mars and Venus Collide", just offering to do something gives you a point before you even do it. Instead of just turning up the heat in his house, he will first say to his wife "You look a litttle cold. Would you like me to turn up the heat?"
In one stroke, he earns 3 points - 1 for noticing her and thinking of her, 1 for offering to do something without being asked, and 1 for turning up the heat.
Now men, listen up! If you bring your wife 12 roses, you would score 1 point for doing it without being asked and 1 point for the roses. Now, if you bring 1 rose 12 times, you would score 24 points!
You get more points from giving hugs than for being a good provider. Asking more specific questions about her day such as 'Did you get what you wanted at the marketing meeting' will also score you more points (for real involvement) than simply asking "How was your day?"
See, we're not that difficult to please.
This post is summarised from book review 'Score some love points" in Life! by Loh Keng Fatt, based on "Why Mars & Venus Collide" by John Gray.
Good tips! Most of it works on the principle that as the man, without being asked or prompted "we should already know".
But it is not so good when having an argument, and the man asks "What's wrong?" The woman shouts back, "You should already know!"
Not so good - because sometimes we really don't know! :P
With women, they're always thinking "It's the thoughts that count", so just appear very thoughtful at all times.
I have to absolutely agree with you here. I know my wife treasures the small things I do more than anything else and those sure give me lots pf 'points' :D
Hi Blur Ting! Nice post! I read "Men are mars and women are from Venus" I think it was the same author that you mentioned. I really enjoyed it :)
We are not that difficult to please? :) Hubby wouldn't agree! :) I still have to moan about my Christmas' gift! :) That reminded me that I still need to write that post I have been forgetting to write since Christmas :)
Have a wonderful day!
HE HE HE HE HE HE HE...interesting post indeed. ;-D
Well, one thing for sure is that I've learnt to tell him exactly what I want instead of waiting for him to ask or waiting for him to give it to me. It's better that way. It's more of a win-win situation for me 'coz men can't read our minds. After all, men hate guessing what the women want.
It's the little things in life, which can mean big things!
I might have to read that book.
this is pretty cute-- and guess what-- i'm forwarding it to soulman!!!
it really is true tho-- and i think men a more difficult to please than men--- don't you???
anyhow--- i hope your day - and the blur- kids- are good to you..
Interesting topic, Blur.
I'm with Amel - got to say it nice and clear as men don't hint or say "yes" when they mean "no... because i'm angry/sad..." like women do.
PS... HAPPY NEW YEAR! :-)
Need to work this point system into my will :)
And if husband has -100 points when I die, he has to pay the debt in heaven! Great, I get to rule him even after death! :)
On a serious note, I am an "action" person. If husband tells me he loves me a million times, he gets 1 point. If he "does" things like helping out around the house, wow, many points for that :)
All the guys should thank me now. Most importantly, thanks to the readers who contributed with more helpful tips!
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